Tuesday, April 30, 2019

Pickled Not Drunken Chicken

A pickled chicken? You mean drunk? 
No fear of this chicken. It is not drunk nor soaked in alcohol. It is soaked in...pickle juice.
Yes you read that right. Pickle juice soaked chicken. I know it sounds crazy but it makes the best, most tender, moist chicken ever.
You've heard of brine, right? A solution of water, salt and spices. Well, this is similar. Except you soak the chicken in dill pickle juice.
And I might have to be drunk to order these "denim panties", have you seen these?? Seriously, they are selling them online, starting at $370 a pair.
THREE HUNDRED AND SEVENTY DOLLARS A PAIR Have they lost their ever loving minds?
Eww, just go commando, it will feel the same. I just can't.
I saw these advertised on Facebook and the link came from an Instagram account.
I apologize I digress.
Back to the chicken...

Now, the chicken recipe inspiration came from someone else. She marinates her chicken in the pickle juice along with several other ingredients. I used the pickle juice only.

I have made this a few times now and we love it each time. The first two times I did dredge it in flour and fry it, the last time I just marinated and grilled only. Still came out extremely tender and juicy.

Pickled chicken
chicken breast tenders (I have also used boneless skinless breast that I thin sliced)
flour
pepper, and paprika, a 1/2-1 tsp of each depending on your taste. (I did not use salt because the pickles of course have salt)
pickle juice (after you eat your pickles, save the jar and juice in the fridge)
just enough oil to pan fry to cut fat and calories of if you don't care, deep fry those bad boys)
Take the tenders and dredge them in the flour with the spices AFTER it has soaked 6-24 hours in the juice. I pour the juice into a zip top bag, gallon size, and let it get all happy. I normally do this first thing in the morning, pop it in the fridge and by 5:30 pm it is ready to go. You can also do it the night before if you work and don't have the time in the mornings. It will be fine.
Use a non skillet pan and add just enough oil to pan fry the tenders, maybe 1-2 TBSP at the most.
Brown one side, flip and brown the other side.
This should take no more than 15 minutes from start to finish.

When I grilled them I soaked the chicken, heated up the grill, placed the chicken on the grill and after 8 minutes flipped them. Done!

Tuesday, April 23, 2019

I Agreed To WHAT? and A Kicked Up Roast Beef Sandwiches

If you are a writer or blogger, sometimes you run into what we call "writers block" when this happens you try all sorts of tricks and look for tips on how to break out of it. Like -
Spam email post...
Have you ever looked in your spam folder? No, not Spam in a can, your spam folder. Junk that goes to your email that if you have a filter system you are lucky enough to never see.
What if...what if you agreed to do or buy the first 10 in your spam folder. (this is totally fiction and just for fun y'all so please don't message me about the dangers of spam emails. It's all in good fun)

Here's what I would have agreed to...
"How to get a hard on up into your 70's!" WOW I can't get a hard on now, so up into my 70's would be remarkable.
Casanova's Dirty Secret, it's how a 70 year old man impregnated over 50 women. Dang, guess I'll need a job to pay all that child support. But wait, does a hard on guarantee children if I'm NOT actually doing the deed and if I don't have a slong? Hmmm

Cooking with Paula Deen the newest cookbook Cooking In Cast iron, well just what I needed. Another cookbook and for cast iron. We just picked up our third LARGE cast iron pan. I wonder if when the book arrives there are recipes I can adapt for the grill. Because seriously I wanted to use the pan on the grill. Goody!

Canadian Pet Care supplies, well we all know they have the socialist medical care system for humans. Why not check out their supplies for pets. Will this stuff pass through customs? Hey, what's this? Homeopathic supplies for anxiety. I wonder if it's weed for cats? Oh no, that's cat nip and we have some of that. Yep, says right here "joint supply" oh never mind that's FOR joints/bone connectors not 'joints' as in weed. Shoot. What am I getting?

Well HOT DANG DIGGITY, FedEx has confirmed my deliver of $4,700,000,000 dollar inheritance check and all I have to do is click on the link and give them my credit card information so they can charge me the international fee of $350. Seems like a good trade. Right? No? Man, think of all the bills I could pay off and the retirement we'd have with that kind of money. I took a chance. (not really y'all this is totally fiction writing)

Your Ambien order is on it's way, we just need you to call 1-800-***-**** to confirm your credit card information and your 90 day supply will be on it's way. Well, I have been having trouble sleeping.

Fun Hook Ups, enjoy these women and flirting while we finish your subscription. Hmm don't remember doing this. Must have been while I was on the Ambien. You know it makes you walk, talk and eat in your sleep. Maybe I signed up for a dating site too. Click here to see who is waiting for you...should I see?

Apparently I'm a NY Surrogate and my payment is overdue. Wait. If I'm a surrogate, shouldn't they pay me? Hey this sounds fishy.

Walk-in bathtubs seem to be the hot ticket right now because well I'm not getting any younger and a fall could render me helpless in my own home. Seems I have an appointment for a tub fitting. How does that work? Do they measure me or the space the tub will go in? Should I call to confirm or just wing it?

OH LUUUCY YOU GOT SOME SPLAIN" TO DO! Seems I have a subscription to Lesbian Love? Hmm how's that gonna work with the Casanova Hard On meds? Don't think the ladies will appreciate that one. Could be cause for concern. Wow...first 10 spam emails? How about Lesbian Love is pages, yes pages, 3-7 in my folder. DANG must have been another Ambien night.

According to Mike Peterson in not one but twelve emails, my US Funds are sitting in a US reserve bank waiting for me to claim them. WOW wonder how much is in reserves?

Sorry if I shocked you, put you in a state of "what the hell is wrong with her" or just confused the snot out of you. It was a fun post and the brain child of Karen over at Baking In A Tornado. Please be sure to stop by and see what crazy spam mail is agreed to.

Now for a delicious recipe:
Kicked Up Roast Beef Sandwiches
good deli quality roast beef, thick sliced
I used Best's Oven flat bottom roast beef, 5 slices
cut into strips
cook with slices of onion and peppers, add a few dashes of Worcestershire sauce, to taste
serve on buns with mayo with or without cheese
Really I'm not sure it qualifies as a recipe but it is truly that simple. I bought roast beef, cut it into strips, sauteed it with onions and peppers, a few dashes of sauce, toasted buns, smeared mayo on them, added a slice of cheese and BAM done.
I hope you enjoyed today's post. It is totally out of the ordinary for me but sometimes you gotta break a few eggs to make an omelet. 

Friday, April 19, 2019

Grocery Funny 2019 FOTW

 The first Saturday after we moved into our new home, my husband decided he was going fishing. He went out in the garage and loaded up his gear. Or so I thought. He leaves. I walk outside to leave and what is in the driveway behind my Jeep? His tackle box and water. I shook my head and laughed. Then I called him. He answered and said "what did I forget?". I laughed and said "what makes you think you forgot something?" "Oh I don't know, me I guess." I said, well you won't get a lot of fishing done because your tackle box is sitting in the driveway.
"OH S*!t, okay I'm turning around now, thank you."
ROTFL
Welcome to a Fly on the Wall group post. Today 7 bloggers are inviting you to catch a glimpse of what you’d see if you were a fly on the wall in our homes. Come on in and buzz around my house.
Buzz around, see what you think, then click on these links for a peek into some other homes:
Baking In A Tornado                  https://www.BakingInATornado.com
Never Ever Give Up Hope             https://batteredhope.blogspot.com
Follow Me Home                        https://followmehome.shellybean.com
The Crazy Mama Llama               https://www.thecrazymamallama.com/
Bookworm in the Kitchen             https://www.bookwormkitchen.com/    

 As you can see he has a rough life. My view from the kitchen window, his office for the day. Sitting in the screened in porch, smoking a cigar, answering emails by phone. Poor guy has it rough. smh
 I get a smaller desk so as to discourage the kitties from "helping" me work. Yeah that's not working out so well as you can tell. Beau is very insistent when he wants to be.
 My bff/Sissy and I text daily. Auto correct has given us some interesting messages over the years but this one takes the cake. 
So I'm sitting on the couch watching AI and JT comes down the stairs, I wasn't really paying attention but all of a sudden he is behind me. "Mom, where is the scooper?" I'm confused. "Scooper, what do you need the litter scooper for?" He says "WHAT? NO the ice cream scooper, what is wrong with you why would I want the one for the litter?" I said "I don't know, maybe you were going to clean it. I'm tired. The scoop is in the bottom drawer on the left."

 Our new house! I love it,even all the stairs. My knees do not but they will adjust, or I hope so. The first photo is a view from the far corner and the second photo was taken from the entry landing.

So, I'm at the store and JT is with me. He kept seeing all kinds of great things I said man, my FOTW post is writing itself in here! YES score.
My Eeyore child, he says "WOW now they have 'organic' Gatorade? I highly doubt it's really organic they just put that crap on there to charge more." Don't hold back your feelings son, tell me what you think. He gets it honest.
 Same store, JT says "WOW you have to tell your employees it's not a break room maybe you should hire better "workers". " I said "another photo op!" I'm loving this place.
 Again, same store, we're walking around and JT says "wow, that doesn't look like normal tea." I look up and it took me a second I'll be honest. I started laughing and said "I must take a picture, of course this is going in my Fly post ya know." He says "you're welcome". LOL this kid.
 Beau has decided every morning now that he needs a drink from the faucet. Never before except on rare occasions has he gotten on the counter, but this one is huge and he loves looking at himself in the mirror. Good grief I think my cat is an egomaniac.
Which one would you try? Both? Neither?
When I showed my husband the picture he said, "well did you buy any?"
um no. "What? Why not? I'd eat the heck out of the bacon but do NOT buy the chicken and waffles that's just gross." THIS coming from the man who once drank from a mud puddle for $5!!

Tuesday, April 16, 2019

Simple Lunch Around the House With The Kitties

We were sitting around one night and I asked my husband, "If the kitties could talk like humans, who do you think they would sound like?"
He thought for about two seconds and said Beau would sound like Thanos. I was like "really??" come on. So he began a google search on famous recognizable voices.
If your pet could talk, what or who would they sound like?

Lily might sound like Scarlet O’Hara or the Nanny-Fran Drescher. Lily is my Southern Bell but the older she gets the louder she gets it is annoying so that made me think of Fran. Sorry my dear.

Sugar would sound like (Prince) I know that made you laugh. But Sugar is my baby doll, he is sweet loving and squeaks but let me go in the bathroom and shut the door, he is howling at the top of his lungs, very demanding. I don't know why, but I thought of Prince. He had the soft, sweet and yes sexy voice but he could belt out a tune as well.

Beau would sound like (my husband thinks Thanos, actor Josh Brolin) I'm thinking a deep sultry very "in command" type of voice. But in that same token, Beau is my love bug, he is a gentle giant coming in at close to 17 pounds. He rarely meows but when he does everyone in the house is like "OH NO" and runs to see what is wrong. So I thought of Sam Elliot and Darrell suggested Jeremy Irons.

Simple Lunch...while I'm home enjoying life with the kitties and life in general I like to have a low key lunch. A lot of times that means leftovers, a salad more times than not and sometimes I throw caution to the wind and eat bread. GASP I know. These bread sticks from Wal-Mart are great for sandwiches, I've stuffed them, baked them, heated them on the grill and sliced them cold for sandwiches. A little light mayo (Dukes mayo only in my house), sliced deli turkey- smoked, the bread sticks have triple cheese and garlic so no need to add cheese. A side of grape tomatoes and a pickle. Done. You may not think to use something other than bread for sandwiches but there are a lot of options. I love to use hamburger buns for my breakfast sandwiches. If you follow me on Instagram you'll see I'm outside of the box when it comes to breakfast and lunch options.

Ms. Lily has taken up residence on the steps going to the top floor. That is until Beau decided that this was the highest spot in the house and of course the King took over.
HEY KING ELVIS! Maybe Beau would sound like Elvis.

In the morning we enjoy coffee while sitting in the screened porch, watching the squirrels and birds. In the afternoon it's a place to wind down and relax before I begin supper preparations. In the evenings we sit and enjoy a drink, talk about our day and just enjoy the peace and quiet. The beauty is that now we can sit outside at night and not be carried away by mosquitoes and not listen to our loud and obnoxious neighbors from the apartment. Oh I do not miss them AT ALL. 
Looking out the bedroom window you can see the side of the porch and deck. Our favorite spot. Everyone's favorite spot. Mine, my husband, son JT and the kitties. They were hesitant at first having always been inside except for 6 years ago when we had the farm. They love it now. It's difficult to get Lily to come in.
One afternoon sitting outside and I caught Sugar just as he was leaping into my lap. Little scamp.
As you can see, both the boys are at my feet. You'll find Ms. Lily by Daddy cause she is his. It's so funny, she's under my feet all day but when he is around I'm not even chopped liver unless I'm giving her a treat or food. Hussy! 
You can't see me because I'm black and hiding behind white blinds with my feet sticking out. Beau. He loves this big window sill and lays up here every morning while the sun is shining.
My panther, he is a mess and I love him so. I took this photo from the living room so you could see him on his sill. This is in the office.
I was laying in bed and heard Beau meow, a rare thing, and I'm calling him. He's not running in, I said what is wrong with him? Then I look up and crack up laughing. Darrell says "what is it?" I picked up my phone and snapped the picture. I showed him, because from his side of the bed he couldn't see him. He laughed too. Beau is such a mess.

What about you? Have you ever thought about who your animals would sound like if they could talk? No?! It's just me? Surely not. Come on, you can share I promise not to judge you.

Monday, April 8, 2019

Spring Clean Up Eating - April BWF

Happy April, I say it every month, but seriously, where does the time go? Okay so as not to dwell on the speeding bullet of time, let's focus on BWF.
Blog With Friends is a group participation post based on a common theme. Several of us get together each month, pick a theme, then interpret that theme to fit our readership/blog/or mood at the time. LOL maybe that's just me. We all post on the same day and time linking to one another.

This month's theme is Spring Cleaning, well thankfully I don't need to do that as we just moved 2 weeks ago. Right now my house is all sparkly clean and I hope to keep it that way. Clutter free and organized. We shall see how that goes. Good intentions...well you know what they say about that.
You might look at the picture below and think I'm joking, but all of this is WW friendly. All meals stay within my points and I'm satisfied. Yes, even that cupcake.
So instead of focusing on cleaning an actual room or house, maybe even a yard. I am focusing on my eating. Since last November when I began this journey, yet again, but this time with help. I've been working on cleaning up my eating habits. Ditching the junk food, fast food, sweets (most of them) and eating more "whole foods".

I have found ways to eat some of my old favorites but in a healthier way.
One is pizza, instead of ordering a pizza I make my own with 2 ingredient dough. So I could eat a 14 inch pizza for 13 points instead of 1 slice of a take out pizza. I don't, but I could. I also use this dough to make bagels, calzones, stromboli, chicken pot pie and bread sticks. Let's not forget the fabulous chili dog bake!
Grilling food to cut down on fat.
Eating non fat yogurt instead of full fat. (be careful as some of these have hidden sugars)
More salad, lots of water and decaf coffee.

Speaking of grills, I purchased my husband a grill for his birthday. In truth the grill was for me. I love to grill and have dearly missed doing so but in an apartment they do not allow them. It's a liability. Folks still grill on their balconies, one night I stepped outside and looked up, flames were shooting 6 feet in the air on the landing above me. Fool was grilling and the lady was screaming, he's telling her to hush so they don't get in trouble. I'm like "YO dude, you're not supposed to grill on the balcony and YES you are going to be in trouble. My husband works for the owners!" Damn fool
Anywho...

So glad to have a grill again. Now my kitchen is outside.The grill I purchased has a side burner so I can sit a pot on there and no need to touch the stove/oven inside!

Grilled Chicken
marinade- 1/2 cup 0% non fat Greek Yogurt Fage
                3 TBSP Dijon mustard
                1 TBSP honey
Mix all ingredients well in a large zip top bag.
6 boneless skinless, fat trimmed, chicken thighs
Rub them down really well and allow to sit for 3-4 hours.
Grill until done.
DEElicious!

Let's see how everyone else is celebrating Spring...
Karen at Baking In A Tornado has a delicious looking cake.

Lydia from Cluttered Genius https://www.clutteredgenius.com

Jules from The Bergham Chronicles is cleaning out the closets https://www.theberghamchronicles.blogspot.com

Stacy of  Stacy Sews and Schools 

Melissa at MLRobinson

Tuesday, April 2, 2019

Commercial Commentator King and Queen and Taco Chicken Loaded Cornbread Bake

Do you get caught up in commercials? We do. Most people use commercials as bathroom breaks and to grab more snacks which we do as well. But seriously, we use the time to evaluate future purchases.

We tend to be the type who mute the TV and make up our own words for the commercials if we are tired and bored. Did you ever watch that show on the SciFi channel when it was spelled that way, the three characters in a movie theater doing voice overs? He loved that show, anyway, it has become our thing. That and smart mouth comments to the person on the screen trying to sell their "NEW AND IMPROVED wonder mop!" oy!! We actually used to love Billy Mays and were saddened when he passed. Infomercials are just not the same.

Example: have you seen the Chevy commercials? I swear when I was looking for a new car I was convinced I was buying a Chevy Traverse. I mean according to the commercial it is JD Powers SUV of the year five years running. I wanted one. I needed one. I would have bought one, except who wants a $600 a month payment on something that doesn't take care of itself and you can't live in? Not me.

Side note: How about a delicious dinner to go with these commercials? My taco chicken loaded cornbread bake was a huge hit! If you are like me and follow WW Freestyle, the only points here is the cornbread and cheese. I don't add sour cream to the top of mine but the guys did.
Here's how it goes, we're comfy on the couch watching TV. A commercial comes on, we become commentators.
Cinnamon Toast Crunch Cereal commercial
Three pieces of  cereal, one licks the middle one and
mmm yum yum yum CHOMP
now there's two pieces.
Larger one of the left, CHOMP, little guy is gone.
All dang it, now I'm all alone. Let me sit this nice bowl of milk out and see if more shows up.
I pick up my phone, click open the Wal-Mart grocery app and guess what goes in the cart. Yep, you guessed it. Cereal.
Next commercial is more "weight" friendly. Naked.
No I'm not being nasty. Naked is a drink, all natural of fruits and veggies.
Big buff guy standing with both hands full of groceries in front of the elevator. Door opens, he looks to the right toward the stairs and says , "yep", runs up the stairs.
My husband looks at me as he walks in, the word NAKED is on the screen. He missed the commercial.
He smiles.
I'm like, what?
He says, well it says NAKED.
Son leaves the room.

Navage...Oh man. I need this. My allergies have been horrid this year. The day after watching the commercial I stop at CVS and pick one up.
Obviously I was NOT paying attention to the commercial. I wasn't I was surfing FB to be honest. I just heard "sinus relief that is drug free". I'm in!!
I get it home, take it out of the box. WHOA what IS this thing? The pamphlet inside says go to....to see an instructional video. I do. I am not! Pump HOW much water into my sinus cavity through one nostril and then what? Vacuum it out through the other nostril. Back to the car and drive to CVS to return said Navage.

"If you're age 50-85 you need to call Colonial Penn today" hey honey do we have enough life insurance?
Why? Planning to bump me off?
No, because it doesn't pay out then.
Yes it does, just not if you kill yourself.
Oh so I could have you snuffed and collect?
Yeah but I'm not enjoying where this conversation is going.
Well, Alex Trebek said we "need" to call Colonial Penn it could cost as little as 35 cents a day! A Day! I asked for the free information.
ugh, did you really?
Yes.
You know we'll get crap in the mail now from every company known to man.
Yeah and ?
Nevermind.

Pringles commercial where the Alexa talks to the guys about mixing combinations of the chips.
My husband says, that's stupid. 
Five minutes later, HEY can your google do that?

M&M's chocolate bar...Christina Applegate is driving and gets fed up with the misbehaving candy.
Husband "DID YOU KNOW?!"
Me "know what?"
H "that they put M&M's IN a candy bar???"
Me "yes I knew"
H "WHY do I not have said candy bar?"
Me "because you don't need one"
H "It's not about need woman"
Me, whips out phone, hits the Wal-Mart grocery app, yep, you guessed it, it goes in the cart.

Capital One, what's in your wallet? Well, Capital One! They were advertising on the telly how easy the car buying process is when you use your Capital One app. Well low and behold guess what. We were at the dealer and it was taking forever. So my husband jumps on the app and within minutes walks over to the salesman. "hey if you're having issues with financing, I'm approved through my bank. Here's the information." BAM BAM BOOM and out the door within no time with my Jeep! YES
Fast forward 3 months. Hubs truck broke down. He needed a transmission and since we had no where to do it ourselves we were looking at $5000!!!!! OUCH on a truck that was 11 years old. He said, "you know I don't really 'need' a truck anymore and I love your Jeep. (of course he does!) wonder what I can find."
Next thing I know, he says "hey want to take me to the dealer to look at this Jeep?"
I said "what?"
He says "yeah, I looked on my Capital One app and found one I like, at a price we can afford. I wanna go look at it."
Three hours later he is a happy man driving home in his new Jeep!
THANK YOU Capital One.

Pick a medication, any prescription medication. "Don't take abc if you are allergic to abc or any ingredients in abc as they may be harmful" well no duh but let me ask you this. If abc is a new medication and I've never taken abc, HOW do I know if I'm allergic???
Perfect for #TacoTuesday
Taco Chicken Loaded Cornbread Bake
Cornbread mix - jiffy
1 Egg
1/3 cup Milk
Bacon bits- about 2 TBSP
Diced sweet peppers 1/4 cup
Diced onion 1/4 of a large onion
Diced fried jalapeƱos - 2 TBSP crushed
Combine all the ingredients and bake in a square 9x9 baking dish that was sprayed with non stick spray. It helps a lot. I baked the cornbread for 1/2 the time it calls for. THEN topped it with the chicken, cheese and green onions.
Once it came out I sprinkled the top with a few more green onions and fresh diced tomatoes. The guys added sour cream to theirs.

Chicken with taco seasoning (the chicken was cooked in the slow cooker with my taco seasoning along with 1/4 cup each diced onions and peppers. Once the chicken was done I shredded it. I used boneless skinless chicken breast. 2 large ones. You could use tenders as well. Or thighs.
This was then baked the remaining time for the cornbread and to melt the cheese on top.
Stop by my friend Karen's blog to see her "customer of the year" post all about commercials. I'm sure it will be a hoot!! Link below