Happy May 4th
May the 4th Be With You
Happy Hump Day
Until I looked it up, I had no idea about all of these. I am a curious sort and wanted to see "what" if any thing was special about today.
Had I known ahead of time I could have prepared a special recipe or two or three but my mind has been a little preoccupied lately.
Life has been stressful, gee, how damn many times have I had to say that recently? Too many I can assure you.
My honey's brother lost his fight with cancer a week ago, we put his remains to rest on Sunday. Cancer may have won the battle but God won the war. Harvey accepted Christ on Easter Sunday and is now resting in peace in the comfort of Jesus. You may not believe that and that is your choice. I respect that. I do believe it, it brings us comfort and hope.
In the midst of all this, I was having trouble breathing and swallowing. It took almost two weeks for the doctor to see me but when he did he moved immediately. Within 5 days I was out of town at the diagnostic imaging center having an ultrasound on my neck/throat/thyroid. I was then told that it would take 3-5 days and my doctor would receive the results. I have an appointment/follow up with my doctor on the 11th. You know it's serious when they call you the very next day and tell you a date and time for a biopsy. Yeah, I am having surgery on the 12th. They found several lumps on the right side of my thyroid. What are they? No idea. But they are coming out.
Here's the deal. I had a panic moment. Unable to breath, sweating, headache, dizzy and OMGosh what the heck?! Then I took a deep breath, internally shook myself, wiped my eyes and said, "Okay, here we go." God knew about all of this before I did. Some say if God is so good and loving, why would he do this. I argue HE did not do it, HE allowed it. Why? Because we live in a fallen world. See when Adam and Eve were in the garden and CHOSE to disobey, the world fell. Sin entered and it has never been the same since. There is death, pain, disease, war, and crime that is unfathomable. The evil that is in the world runs rampant BUT God is in control. HE allows these things so that we see our need for him. In our weakness we are strong IN HIM. So why am I scared? Because I'm human. When I look with my human eyes, I see pain, sickness and death. I'm not ready for that. When I look with my spiritual eyes I see God's provision, His protection, His plan to make me stronger. I don't pretend to understand it all but I do know that HE has my best interest at heart, that HIS plans and ways are better and higher than mine. Will I have moments of weakness, tears and fears, yes I will, but I will not camp there. I will get through this just like every other physical challenge in my life and trust me there have been a lot.
I was told not to write about personal things, especially health issues and home. It is my blog, my creative outlet, my diary of sorts and I felt impressed upon to share. No one may care and my story may not affect anyone but I just really needed to get all this out of my head today and writing helps.
Now on to happier notes, like this dessert! I wanted something that the guys would enjoy. I am a chocolate lover but they are not. I also wasn't in the mood to bake because we were having a record breaking heat index day for the end of April. So, I came up with this dessert. Not original I am sure. It was light, fluffy, tart, sweet and delicious. We all enjoyed it and I will most likely repeat it with a different flavor.
Square casserole dish, 9x9 or 8x8
Nilla wafers (enough to cover the bottom of the pan)
cool whip (8 oz)
pudding, I used lemon old fashioned cooked version (you could use instant)
*cook the pudding according to the box*
cream cheese (whipped 4 oz)
butter, softened and room temperature 1/4 cup
powdered sugar 3/4 cup
walnuts, chopped 1/4 cup
Cook the pudding according to the box or use instant. Layer the wafers in the bottom of the pan. Top with the pudding. Place in the freezer while preparing the next part. Mix the cream cheese, butter, and powdered sugar, blend well and spread on top of the pudding. Next top with cool whip and walnuts. Chill for several hours or overnight.
Slice and enjoy!