Friday, April 29, 2016

Almond Energy and Mini the Pug Funny Friday

Happy Friday everyone and welcome to another Funny Friday! You know, we are given a photo and then we have to write 5 captions...sometimes this is easier than others. This month's was fun, thanks Minette! 
First I'm sharing my newest 'good for you' snack. Yes, I'm still plugging away at being healthier and eating better, well snacking better anyway. LOL
I recently saw a post on Facebook from Deliciously Ella and thought "MAN I need these, right now!" So I looked around and didn't have the exact ingredients but close enough. Here is what I did:
1 cup almonds, raw
2 cups dates, pitted and halved
3 TBSP cocoa powder (I use NuNaturals)
2 1/2 TBSP WOWbutter (you can use almond butter)
2 TBSP coconut oil
1 tsp honey (I added this because my dates were not very sweet and dry)
It's very simple, place the nuts in the food processor and pulse until fine and grainy, then add the other ingredients and blend until smooth. It will come together in a big ball or tube in the bowl. Next roll the mix into balls, store in the fridge for several weeks or even freeze them. A great pop in your mouth snack and go. Full of nutrients and just the right amount of sweetness. ENJOY! I am.
Funny Friday  150 X 150.jpg
Today’s post is this month’s Funny Friday, a regular feature published on the last Friday of every month. Funny Friday is a collaborative project. Each month one of the participants submits a picture, then we all write 5 captions or thoughts inspired by that month’s picture. Links to the other bloggers’ posts are below, click on them and see what they’ve come up with. I hope we bring a smile to your face as you start your weekend.

Here’s today’s picture. It was submitted by Minette over at Southern Belle Charm
27 - Southern Belle Charm - April 2016.jpg

1. Staring at the screen Mini thought, I just don't feel like myself today.

2. Walking in the room, John saw the pug staring at the computer. Now where did Mini go?

3. Mini spoke, "John, I'm not feeling well." John hit the floor.

4. Mini said "GREAT he just has to have all the attention! I can't feel bad for just one minute around this house!!"

5. Mini woke up! OMGosh what a dream! I need to get my mind off the next SSS it is making me nuts! Maybe I can request a different subject. This one is giving me nightmares.

Click on the links below and let some other bloggers make you smile:     The Bergham Chronicles                Not That Sarah Michelle                Southern Belle Charm                                  My Brain on Kids
Baking In A Tornado
  Someone Else’s Genius
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Friday, April 22, 2016

Walnut Energy Bites and FOTW April 2016

Hey howdy hey, watz up and all that stuff. Today is Friday, woo hoo and that always means some sort of writing challenge. Today is my favorite one! Fly On The Wall. This is where you get a glimpse into my everyday life, work, things I see and hear while out and about, or antics of LMSP. Which I KNOW you all love!
First let me share this...I have gotten WAY too far from my healthy eating and am feeling it. I have sadly gained 12 pounds and am determined to get rid of them plus some. In doing so, I need to slow down, stop, cease and desist with the desserts. NO I won't stop baking but I am slowing down considerably but I need, yes need sweets and snacks. So I'm sharing one of my new favorites with you. A healthy sweet treat that requires NO BAKING or cooking of any kind.
Walnut Energy Bites
 Super easy to make, one by one the ingredients go into the food processor and then you roll little balls, put them in the fridge and enjoy! See:
1 cup walnuts
1 cup (mejool dates work best)dates, pitted and halved
2 TBSP cocoa powder (I used NuNaturals Dutch Processed Cocoa Powder)
1/2 tsp raw honey (because my dates were not as sweet as usual)
Pulse the nuts in the processor, then add the dates, cocoa and honey. Process until it comes together in a sticky ball or a tube. Scoop by the tsp or two and make balls. Place in the fridge in an air tight container, these will stay good for several weeks and freeze really well too.

Remember to visit the other bloggers and read about all the funny things happening in their world too!
Juicebox Confession   LINK:  
Menopausal Mother   LINK:
Never Ever Give Up Hope    LINK:
Dinosaur Superhero Mommy  LINK:    
Southern Belle Charm  LINK:    
My Brain on Kids    LINK:
Go Mama O    LINK:
I was sitting in the doctor's examine room and Wade was in the lobby waiting. He was laughing because all the patients waiting when we got there , well their jaws dropped when I walked up to the counter and was called right back. Some of the folks had been waiting for almost 2 hours. Background, they were walk-ins, I was a follow up appointment. So, I'm in the back and he's waiting. When we left he said, those old people were getting mad. One elderly man looked over at an elderly woman and said "hey that sign says if you are having chest pains or bleeding we will take you first." He then says, "you cut my finger and I'll cut yours so we can go back" Wade said it was all he could do not to bust out loud. I think I would have.

I've been referring to Wade's son as Hoover in these post. Why you ask? Because he inhales all the food in the house like a vacuum cleaner. So I've been calling him Hoover. He was reading my blog, surprise! A 17 year old young man reading his pseudo step mom's blog!! Success!! Anyway, he says, "WHY don't you use my real name?"
I said, well I didn't know if you would be okay with that.
He said "I don't care"
I said "okay"
So..Hoover is Travis or Travi as his friends call him. BUT we saw a Facebook post and decided his name is now...
Potato May Bradford
The post said: What is your celebrity baby name? 1. Last vegetable you ate. 2. What month were you born in? 3. What city were in you born in?
So now we refer to him as "Potato May"

We're eating supper and Potato May (LOL) says "Dang Dawn, this food is too freakin' good, it's all your fault I'm getting fat!"
I said, "oh yeah, like I'm forcing you to eat." hahaha
He said, "well I don't want to hurt your feelings so I eat"
I said, "BUT 4 plates??!!"
He just laughs
This kid is a mess.

Wade is in the kitchen and then walking down the hall, as he goes he passes gas. Potato May giggles, I roll my eyes. He turns around "I apologize I think water gives me gas"
I laugh "everything gives you gas"
He says "oh yeah, wait until tonight I'll work you over"
I knew he was referring to gassing me out during the night, NOT something I want. But being quick on my feet or wits I said
"Oh yeah? oooh work me over baby!"
Travis very quietly gets up and leaves the room.
Wade falls out laughing and yells "GOOD NIGHT TRAVIS, WE'LL TRY TO BE QUIET!"
Poor kid, I'm busting a gut laughing. That what the kid gets for telling everyone that we are teenagers and all we do is...well you know. LOL we are old, THAT is not all we do but thanks for the compliment kid. hahahaa

Potato May and his friends are strange to say the least. Their new thing is vaping. If you're not familiar it's a box with batteries that holds a small tube with "juice". When you inhale it is vapor which can contain nicotine or not. Anyway...he says to me "my friends and I have vooping sessions at McDonald's". I said "WHAT?"
He laughs, "yeah, you know, vooping, it's when we vape while pooping."
I'm shaking my head.
Later that night he grabs his vape and heads toward the bathroom, he looks back at me and says "I'm taking my drink with me while I voop, so if I'm drinking and pooping while vaping, is it "drooping?"
LOL this kid!
This is what it looks like...(I am NOT endorsing it, just an explanation in photos)The bigger the cloud the cooler you are. SMH

On to happier subjects...LMSP has a big girl bike now! After 30 minutes she was like "I'm a pro" laughing , she's a mess. Can you guess her favorite color?!
Hiding in my files, I found a draft from LAST OCTOBER that I forgot about... man my head. Anyway, here is what I found:
After not driving the dialysis route for a few months, I drove it on the 16th. There are several new passengers, one has moved to a nursing home and one passed away. But my guys are still there and kicking. As soon as I pulled up at the center, Mr K comes rolling over and I opened the door.
"HEY where you been?" he said.
I laughed and said "driving."
"Not here you ain’t." Replied Mr. K
I laughed again, "I know but I’m here today."
"Good put down that lift and load me up baby," Mr. K
I said “HEY don’t be so bossy”
Mr. M says “oh damn we got a smart ass today”
I looked at him and said “it’s a long walk home you might want to be nice AND how am I a smart ass?”
He says, “See there ya go again”
I rolled my eyes and said, “Get up here and sit down”
These men, I had already been at work for 9 hours and he wants to give me grief, I don’t think so.
 **Earlier this month(March 2016) M passed away.. I picked up my morning paper, read the front page and turned, there were the obituaries, and I saw his name. He was 51. I just sat there, remembering the last time I took him is but a vapor.**

I took Ms. N home. When I walked in, she said “Oh girl tell me you’re here to take me home!” I said “I sure am Ms. N, are you ready?” She “oh lawd yes gurl I’m past ready.”
"Well then Ms. N let’s load up.” She smiled and said “honey Ms. N is right behind you.” I love this woman, she is sweet as she can be and I was thrilled to take her home because she moved the weekend I did and she is safe and out of the projects!

I pulled up at dialysis and got out of the bus, I see A standing outside and wave.  She yells “OH LAWD y’all look out Trouble’s daughter is here!” then she laughs and ask how I am.  She was one of my dad’s technicians when he was on dialysis and she called him trouble.  She loved him and attended his funeral.  There are a lot of workers that remember my daddy and tell me how much they thought of him.  Some days it’s easier to hear than others but it does always make me smile.  My daddy picked on them all, made them all laugh and even encouraged some of the other patients to keep at it, even when he wanted to quit. Dialysis is very hard on you, it wears you out, but when you go into renal failure you do or die, it’s that simple.

Travis is telling me all about the pep rally. “And Dawn I’m sitting on the bleachers minding my own business when these 3 freshmen girls come and sit down with me.”
I said “okay so what’s wrong with that.  I mean I know you’re a senior but are freshmen really that bad?”
"YES they are, they are 14 years old! I am 17 and I am a healthy 17 year old boy I can only take so much ya know!”
Laughing I said, “What do you mean?”
He says, “well one sat one each side of me and one sat on the bleacher in front of me, she kept leaning back and pushed her shoulder between my legs! Then she starts rubbing her shoulder into my crotch! I can only be good so long, ya know!”
I was like “OMG are you serious?!”
"YES Dawn, that’s what I’m saying, these girls were rubbing on me, LICKING my arm, it was gross, I came home and took a shower!”
GOOD GRIEF who is raising these girls???

W and I are at breakfast, sitting in Bojangles, listening to the elderly people in there visit. It is quite comical actually. The lady says “his wife has been dead, what about 5 weeks?  The man replies, “No I think it’s been a little over a month.”  W looks at me and says" isn’t 5 weeks just a little over a month?"  I’m cracking up, yes it is. We both shake our heads.  I said just think, one day that will be us.  He said I hope not," I don’t want to sit in BoJangles and discuss how long you’ve been dead.” Aww, me neither.
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Tuesday, April 19, 2016

Wonderful Wednesday 4/19

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